CONTEXT: Names have all been changed for anonimity, there's a lot of inside references and memory references that may not seem as significant to any reader, but just wanted to put this out there to let people know to not get complacent in the relationship and let them get away. I still hope one day I find my way back to her, but for now this was the final letter I left her.
Dear Michelle,
I’ve spent a countless number of days staring at this blank piece of paper not knowing what to do with it or what to say. The number of times I’ve scrunched it up and had to restart is crazy. I’d be lying if I didn’t say I still don’t know what I’m doing with this, just putting all cards on the table I guess. But most importantly I’d be lying if I didn’t say that I miss you and think about that gorgeous face of yours all the time. In no way is this me trying to “get you back”, no ill intentions or anything negative, please understand this.It’s been many years since I’ve used an actual pen to write on a piece of paper, the last being your “Get Well Soon” card when you were upset about you and your ex and your Christmas Card. Not having you in my life anymore has granted me a lot of time to myself to think and process my life. Believe me, I’ve done a LOT of thinking, about you, about me, about us and life in general. You’ll be happy to know I’ve done a lot of growing and all this period. All that I ask is IF you do read this, try to take in every word and read it meaningfully with no distractions. I write this with all my heart.
Remember the day I planned on asking you out to make things official? I dedicated the entire day to being all about you and keeping that beautiful huge smile on your face. I took you to get your ears pierced, we then went to Chadstone and shopped around, came home to nap before I took you to the Melbourne Star wheel. The glimmer in your eyes throughout the day and even while in the deck was mesmerizing and I couldn’t have been a happier man, unfortunately we were plagued by the indians and their families in the same cabin so I wasn’t able to fulfill my plan on asking you out but we laughed about it in the car ride home and at least it gave us a funny story on how we came to be official. Although I was grateful and thankful for the amazing time I got to spend with you then and especially the feeling of your warmth and comfort when you were cuddled in my arms and in that moment looking at you watching the view with me I couldn’t help think to myself, I’ve never cared about someone so precious ever in my life but most of all, you’ve never looked more gorgeous than in that one moment.
Or even the night I took you to the Conservatory, you wore my favourite outfit of yours but we were still a bit shy with one another. You were quiet at the dinner table as we were still early together but the vibe was mutually great and the night outside was as beautiful as you were. Never have I seen someone I love look so amazing while messily munching down on a buffet of food, that was the night you showed me you were a Little Piggy. The funniest part of the night was seeing your shock and guilt with the bill, I don’t need to tell you the cheeky laugh it gave me to see you like that as I was doing it right in your face. Although, my favourite part of the night was when we parked out the front of your house and chilled there for the longest time and enjoyed each other's company, in that moment, was when I knew, there’s no place I’d ever rather be than with my arms around you.
My all time favourite moment would have to be the time we spent staying at Crown. There has never been a better set of days in my life as perfect as those. It was all unforgettable, from the moment we came and just jumped in bed to cuddle, going to the Galactic Circus and playing the arcade games, especially the fun playing air hockey having to pretend to lose to you, seeing so concentrated on winning and then the smile that erupted on your face when you did, I couldn’t help but smile and think to myself, this angel makes me feel at home. The coolest part was the dinners on both nights, Korean BBQ the first night then having the pleasure of Jono and Erin to join us at Kitchen Workshop for the second night, the casino with them after it was fun as hell. What set each day in stone in my mind was showing you how much you meant to me when making love to you every night, I’ll never forget how lost I was staring into your beautiful blue eyes, I still do to this day and they’ll always be my true favourite feature of you. I’ve had a countless number of memorable cherished experiences with you and it is an honour for a lot of these experiences with me to be your firsts in general.
You’ve taught me so much over these past couple years that we’ve dated, you’ve shown me how to be a better person day by day by treating everyone with the same kindness, love and respect that you’d love reciprocated by them back. I’ve slowly learnt from you on how to be the bigger person in situations instead of sinking down to their level, how to be a mature man and not the Shaun I used to be before I met you. I love the man I have become because of you and have always hoped that you were lowkey proud of my development, all thanks to how amazing you are. Props to your amazing parents for raising the beautiful woman you are today. I know I still have faults, I admit that and take full responsibility for them all but I have grown heaps especially these past few weeks and am still working on them. You may think I never listen to you but I’d like you to trust me, because I always am, I listen to every word of your recommendations on how to be better, at the time I’m just a tiny bit ignorant about it but don’t let that deter you from thinking that I don’t take your words in.
The one thing I have loved being able to do with you that I am unable to do with anyone else EVER is ALWAYS FEELING COMFORTABLE coming to you whenever I need do things like vent, a shoulder to cry on or help with how to deal with certain situations because I found that no one else could ever help as much as you could and would. I loved being able to vent to you about any and every one of my problems throughout my day or life in general, you were my rock, I felt safe and at home knowing that you genuinely cared and were also giving me endless support and advice. It felt good knowing someone was genuinely listening to me and was there. I have always tried my 100% best to do the same for you and I hope I have reciprocated that same feeling back. I hope that you always knew and felt comfortable coming to me to vent about anything, work, life, any of your problems like your career troubles, friends (I’m not going to name all the troubles, we both know everything). Whenever you did rest assured that I always dedicated you my 100% undivided attention and support and would always drop whatever I was doing and come straight over to cheer you up whenever I possibly could because I wanted to always be there for you, seeing you sad is my least favourite thing in the world, it still is.
Most importantly, the one thing I think of that is most special in my life and that I hold very dearly to me is two words:
2 Weeks
In the little over 4 weeks I spent chasing you, I realised that all it took was only the last 2 that meant something to me. 2 Weeks together. 2 Weeks was all it took for me to fall in love with you. I remember our first kiss like it’s tattooed in my mind. I remember every moment, from coming to Jenna’s house to take you home, meeting Rachel for the first time and listening to her saying “you have a really nice car”, you whispering something to her before she closed your door, something that we will both never know which has always crossed my mind, in a happy and funny way. I remember playing our song OTW in the car going towards Mia's place and you falling asleep while it happened, I remember looking at you there so drunk, yet peaceful and full of life, happy in the moment even though you were asleep, no sight has ever lit up my world more than that. Taking you to Mia's house and conversing and getting along with all your friends was great but then our moment happened. I remember holding you so you wouldn’t stumble while walking me to my car, I remember you caressing my arms while we looked into each other’s eyes and all I could think was, there’s nothing in the world that I wouldn’t do for this angel to keep her happy, then you kissed me. You kissed me Michelle. I felt the touch of those soft amazing lips against mine and you turned my whole world upside down, the funny thing is, I was so full of happiness and shock that a tear came out of me left eye and I’m not even joking, I wasn’t crying but it was just one tear and I was praying that you wouldn’t notice and that it didn’t run across your face for you to feel it, thank god you didn’t and this is the first time you’re hearing about it. I laugh every time I think about it. I remember the drive home being one of the longest drives home as I had the windows, sunroof open pumping my hands and waving my arms around like I just scored the winning shot for the NBA Finals. I remember screaming YES!!!!!! FUCK YES!!!!! WOOOOOO!!!! I LOVE THIS WOMAN!!!! YESSSSSS!!!! ALL THE WAY HOME, I didn't care if any cars next to me heard or saw, loving life. What adds to this is how you became not only my partner, but my best friend as well. I love how I’m able to be 100% weird and silly with you, I love how much I’m able to be myself around you and share my humour with you, amazing how you find the same humour as me funny. We share a lot of history together. We’ve got history. When I started getting you into Chris Brown properly, then you started sharing the same interests and hobbies as mine (reps, Jordans, setups, gaming, tech, youtubers, PCs, shoes, I got you into the Marvel Universe, then you branched out and we kind of shared Star Wars together too, you branching out into streaming, finding your own favourite games like Skyrim), I loved the influence we’ve had on one another's lives and have always tried to support everything you do, I hope you know that (e.g. like always watching your streams to keep your viewer count up, helping you with your setup ideas, stresses, etc).
I constantly thought to myself, where am I ever going to find someone this gorgeous who’s into literally everything I’m into as well but is somehow still unique in her own way (I love how you enjoy listening to game and movie soundtracks, reading into things like lore of games and stuff, the list doesn’t end). Not only were you my girl, you were my best friend, more than Jono or Jack, more than anyone. My favourite thing is how you even kind of listened to Jake Miller and Zayn when I started playing them in the car and you started singing along and suggesting which songs you like, never been happier and prouder than realising our music taste influences one another, that Post Malone concert we went to was another night I won’t forget. I hope we never leave each other’s lives and stay close, there’s no one in the world like you, I won’t lie when I say I genuinely do hope we find our way back to each other but that’s not me telling you it HAS to happen or like forcing you or anything. It also is definitely not my intent on writing this letter, like I said, I just wanted to speak my mind and also put all my cards on the table. I know you told me not to wait, I listen, I completely understand and have accepted it may not work out, it’s just a little bit hope, I say it with full confidence that I’ll never love someone as much as I love you, you’re my best friend, my soul mate and although you don’t like ‘Friends’, you’re my Rachel, it’s you Michelle, it’s always been you.
It’s been mind-blowing to have you in my life and I am forever grateful and thankful for everything you’ve taught me, helped me with, changed in me (willingly, wanting to and for the better) and especially shown me (like how much I can love someone both as my bestie and my partner, taking advantage of every opportunity given in life). I truly mean it when I say thank you for everything, all the memories, the history, everything. You are a blessing on this Earth.
Thank you Michelle.
submitted by CONTEXT: Names have all been changed for anonimity, there's a lot of inside references and memory references that may not seem as significant to any reader, but just wanted to put this out there to let people know to not get complacent in the relationship and let them get away. I still hope one day I find my way back to her, but for now this was the final letter I left her.
Dear Michelle,
I’ve spent a countless number of days staring at this blank piece of paper not knowing what to do with it or what to say. The number of times I’ve scrunched it up and had to restart is crazy. I’d be lying if I didn’t say I still don’t know what I’m doing with this, just putting all cards on the table I guess. But most importantly I’d be lying if I didn’t say that I miss you and think about that gorgeous face of yours all the time. In no way is this me trying to “get you back”, no ill intentions or anything negative, please understand this.It’s been many years since I’ve used an actual pen to write on a piece of paper, the last being your “Get Well Soon” card when you were upset about you and your ex and your Christmas Card. Not having you in my life anymore has granted me a lot of time to myself to think and process my life. Believe me, I’ve done a LOT of thinking, about you, about me, about us and life in general. You’ll be happy to know I’ve done a lot of growing and all this period. All that I ask is IF you do read this, try to take in every word and read it meaningfully with no distractions. I write this with all my heart.
Remember the day I planned on asking you out to make things official? I dedicated the entire day to being all about you and keeping that beautiful huge smile on your face. I took you to get your ears pierced, we then went to Chadstone and shopped around, came home to nap before I took you to the Melbourne Star wheel. The glimmer in your eyes throughout the day and even while in the deck was mesmerizing and I couldn’t have been a happier man, unfortunately we were plagued by the indians and their families in the same cabin so I wasn’t able to fulfill my plan on asking you out but we laughed about it in the car ride home and at least it gave us a funny story on how we came to be official. Although I was grateful and thankful for the amazing time I got to spend with you then and especially the feeling of your warmth and comfort when you were cuddled in my arms and in that moment looking at you watching the view with me I couldn’t help think to myself, I’ve never cared about someone so precious ever in my life but most of all, you’ve never looked more gorgeous than in that one moment.
Or even the night I took you to the Conservatory, you wore my favourite outfit of yours but we were still a bit shy with one another. You were quiet at the dinner table as we were still early together but the vibe was mutually great and the night outside was as beautiful as you were. Never have I seen someone I love look so amazing while messily munching down on a buffet of food, that was the night you showed me you were a Little Piggy. The funniest part of the night was seeing your shock and guilt with the bill, I don’t need to tell you the cheeky laugh it gave me to see you like that as I was doing it right in your face. Although, my favourite part of the night was when we parked out the front of your house and chilled there for the longest time and enjoyed each other's company, in that moment, was when I knew, there’s no place I’d ever rather be than with my arms around you.
My all time favourite moment would have to be the time we spent staying at Crown. There has never been a better set of days in my life as perfect as those. It was all unforgettable, from the moment we came and just jumped in bed to cuddle, going to the Galactic Circus and playing the arcade games, especially the fun playing air hockey having to pretend to lose to you, seeing so concentrated on winning and then the smile that erupted on your face when you did, I couldn’t help but smile and think to myself, this angel makes me feel at home. The coolest part was the dinners on both nights, Korean BBQ the first night then having the pleasure of Jono and Erin to join us at Kitchen Workshop for the second night, the casino with them after it was fun as hell. What set each day in stone in my mind was showing you how much you meant to me when making love to you every night, I’ll never forget how lost I was staring into your beautiful blue eyes, I still do to this day and they’ll always be my true favourite feature of you. I’ve had a countless number of memorable cherished experiences with you and it is an honour for a lot of these experiences with me to be your firsts in general.
You’ve taught me so much over these past couple years that we’ve dated, you’ve shown me how to be a better person day by day by treating everyone with the same kindness, love and respect that you’d love reciprocated by them back. I’ve slowly learnt from you on how to be the bigger person in situations instead of sinking down to their level, how to be a mature man and not the Shaun I used to be before I met you. I love the man I have become because of you and have always hoped that you were lowkey proud of my development, all thanks to how amazing you are. Props to your amazing parents for raising the beautiful woman you are today. I know I still have faults, I admit that and take full responsibility for them all but I have grown heaps especially these past few weeks and am still working on them. You may think I never listen to you but I’d like you to trust me, because I always am, I listen to every word of your recommendations on how to be better, at the time I’m just a tiny bit ignorant about it but don’t let that deter you from thinking that I don’t take your words in.
The one thing I have loved being able to do with you that I am unable to do with anyone else EVER is ALWAYS FEELING COMFORTABLE coming to you whenever I need do things like vent, a shoulder to cry on or help with how to deal with certain situations because I found that no one else could ever help as much as you could and would. I loved being able to vent to you about any and every one of my problems throughout my day or life in general, you were my rock, I felt safe and at home knowing that you genuinely cared and were also giving me endless support and advice. It felt good knowing someone was genuinely listening to me and was there. I have always tried my 100% best to do the same for you and I hope I have reciprocated that same feeling back. I hope that you always knew and felt comfortable coming to me to vent about anything, work, life, any of your problems like your career troubles, friends (I’m not going to name all the troubles, we both know everything). Whenever you did rest assured that I always dedicated you my 100% undivided attention and support and would always drop whatever I was doing and come straight over to cheer you up whenever I possibly could because I wanted to always be there for you, seeing you sad is my least favourite thing in the world, it still is.
Most importantly, the one thing I think of that is most special in my life and that I hold very dearly to me is two words:
2 Weeks
In the little over 4 weeks I spent chasing you, I realised that all it took was only the last 2 that meant something to me. 2 Weeks together. 2 Weeks was all it took for me to fall in love with you. I remember our first kiss like it’s tattooed in my mind. I remember every moment, from coming to Jenna’s house to take you home, meeting Rachel for the first time and listening to her saying “you have a really nice car”, you whispering something to her before she closed your door, something that we will both never know which has always crossed my mind, in a happy and funny way. I remember playing our song OTW in the car going towards Mia's place and you falling asleep while it happened, I remember looking at you there so drunk, yet peaceful and full of life, happy in the moment even though you were asleep, no sight has ever lit up my world more than that. Taking you to Mia's house and conversing and getting along with all your friends was great but then our moment happened. I remember holding you so you wouldn’t stumble while walking me to my car, I remember you caressing my arms while we looked into each other’s eyes and all I could think was, there’s nothing in the world that I wouldn’t do for this angel to keep her happy, then you kissed me. You kissed me Michelle. I felt the touch of those soft amazing lips against mine and you turned my whole world upside down, the funny thing is, I was so full of happiness and shock that a tear came out of me left eye and I’m not even joking, I wasn’t crying but it was just one tear and I was praying that you wouldn’t notice and that it didn’t run across your face for you to feel it, thank god you didn’t and this is the first time you’re hearing about it. I laugh every time I think about it. I remember the drive home being one of the longest drives home as I had the windows, sunroof open pumping my hands and waving my arms around like I just scored the winning shot for the NBA Finals. I remember screaming YES!!!!!! FUCK YES!!!!! WOOOOOO!!!! I LOVE THIS WOMAN!!!! YESSSSSS!!!! ALL THE WAY HOME, I didn't care if any cars next to me heard or saw, loving life. What adds to this is how you became not only my partner, but my best friend as well. I love how I’m able to be 100% weird and silly with you, I love how much I’m able to be myself around you and share my humour with you, amazing how you find the same humour as me funny. We share a lot of history together. We’ve got history. When I started getting you into Chris Brown properly, then you started sharing the same interests and hobbies as mine (reps, Jordans, setups, gaming, tech, youtubers, PCs, shoes, I got you into the Marvel Universe, then you branched out and we kind of shared Star Wars together too, you branching out into streaming, finding your own favourite games like Skyrim), I loved the influence we’ve had on one another's lives and have always tried to support everything you do, I hope you know that (e.g. like always watching your streams to keep your viewer count up, helping you with your setup ideas, stresses, etc).
I constantly thought to myself, where am I ever going to find someone this gorgeous who’s into literally everything I’m into as well but is somehow still unique in her own way (I love how you enjoy listening to game and movie soundtracks, reading into things like lore of games and stuff, the list doesn’t end). Not only were you my girl, you were my best friend, more than Jono or Jack, more than anyone. My favourite thing is how you even kind of listened to Jake Miller and Zayn when I started playing them in the car and you started singing along and suggesting which songs you like, never been happier and prouder than realising our music taste influences one another, that Post Malone concert we went to was another night I won’t forget. I hope we never leave each other’s lives and stay close, there’s no one in the world like you, I won’t lie when I say I genuinely do hope we find our way back to each other but that’s not me telling you it HAS to happen or like forcing you or anything. It also is definitely not my intent on writing this letter, like I said, I just wanted to speak my mind and also put all my cards on the table. I know you told me not to wait, I listen, I completely understand and have accepted it may not work out, it’s just a little bit hope, I say it with full confidence that I’ll never love someone as much as I love you, you’re my best friend, my soul mate and although you don’t like ‘Friends’, you’re my Rachel, it’s you Michelle, it’s always been you.
It’s been mind-blowing to have you in my life and I am forever grateful and thankful for everything you’ve taught me, helped me with, changed in me (willingly, wanting to and for the better) and especially shown me (like how much I can love someone both as my bestie and my partner, taking advantage of every opportunity given in life). I truly mean it when I say thank you for everything, all the memories, the history, everything. You are a blessing on this Earth.
Thank you Michelle.
submitted by Rachel Schneider
ENG 477
Date 1/11/2021
Marsha Blackburn
A Writing Portfolio
I want to write my own fiction stories one day; I have had a book or two swimming around in my head so I will put the computer to good use and get that typed out one of these days. In this instance I chose my 5 stories and even though one is a marketing inquiry I had fun writing it, so here are my things and some background some of them.
Resume: It is a basic one because my photo ones were not particularly good, and this is an honest resume besides the ones I made for class and I did fudge on those.
Cover letter: I made up the cover letter though there is a penguin Books but it is always fun to use your imagination!
Hike with Drew: I got the concept from a Writer’s Digest and entered it into a contes I never got a response but good practice.
Short Story Vegas: Was one I did for another class but in here I changed it and the story was much better the second time.
Marketing Flyer: This was fun to do those are stock photos of the dogs and squeaky toys, but I like Pit Bulls and dog toys are fun as well.
Scott part 1-This is a story I am working on with another writer, warning its very sexy and some naughty words are in there as well.
Writing Samples: I made these three samples up one day because as I have looked for writing work, I have seen people want a sample of your work, so I came up with these.
Rachel Schneider
3867 Houghton Ave Riverside CA 92501 📷
951-743-8911 📷
[email protected] 📷
Rachel Schneider 📷
Rachel7Tori-Twitter 📷
📷
Objective To get a career going in the fiction/short story writing industry my imagination can run with any scenario and to write is to live.
📷
Education Bachelor of Arts in English | Grand Canyon University 2017 – 2021
Took 15 different writing courses, creative writing and even two fun marketing classes all to polish up my craft. Carried a 3.0 GPA and did the courses all online as well.
No Degree Obtained | Riverside Community College June 1994 – December 1996
Took these college courses but did not finish got 32 Units of Child Development Courses though which is what I was going for
📷
Experience Cafeteria Worker 1 2008 Currently Employed. Cook, Prep, serve food in a middle school setting, also clean, count inventory and do next day prep, cash handling and POS register experience.
Bell Ringer | Salvation Army November 2007 – December 2007
Rang bell and collected donations for the salvation Army in front of various stores during the holiday season.
📷
Skills Food handlers Card
CPR First Aid certified
Grammar Proficiency
Spelling Proficiency
Can work from home
📷
Activities Have good use of social media and can help update or bring in new followers with my creative writing side. Have a Reddit account as well with 30 stories up on that site. Can speak a little Spanish and Hebrew as well.
951-743-8911
[email protected] 3867 Houghton Ave Riverside CA 92501
Rachel Schneider
Writer
Penguin Books
Dear JENNIFER MCGREGOR,
1/21/2021
Jennifer McGregor
Fiction Publisher
4587 Tropicana Rd.
Las Vegas NV 89102
I have included my resume for the short story writer for young adult novels. It has been a few years, but I currently work in a middle school, so I do see all the angst and sass that goes with being a young teen. I do hope my writing samples can help me move to the top of the list. I look forward to working with Penguin Books and letting kids know being a teen is hard at first, but it does not last forever.
Sincerely,
Rachel Schneider
Rachel Schneider
3867 Houghton Ave
Riverside CA 92501
It had been a long cold winter Drew and I could not get out for a morning hike till today. Being 75 degrees, we did not have to wear many layers. He is an extremely sweet inquisitive boy who always asks a lot of questions. Why does moss grow on the north side of trees” he asks? Its times like this when it would be nice to have my husband here, but he is overseas where the work is. “well, it’s not just the north side it’s on the shadier side because that is where the moisture is.”
On we went looking at snails on the ground watching the deer pass by along a ridge. Being quiet as to not startle them. “Mom he whispered it’s a bunny den they are coming out for food, he leaves a few carrot and lettuce scraps from last night’s dinner. I walked down the path and spotted some glorious Blue Jays and a Downey Woodpecker. “Listen Drew the woodpecker is getting the bugs out of the trees.” My sweet Drew was staring at the Bunnies, they are cute and fluffy after all. We followed our path down further after the bunnies went back to the den.
The skies were getting cloudy, so I hoped the rain was not going to come back. Though the weather report said there was a chance. My little explorer with his school uniform on was undeterred, I wish I could wear shorts on a 75 day and not be cold, it is always nice to be young. Walking along our path we spot some squirrels running in circles around the tree. “Why do the chase each other like that” Drew asks. “Maybe it’s a game for them like ring around the Rosie.”
On we trek to our favorite stream where the deer family are taking their drinks. I tell Drew we cannot skip stones right now we do not want to scare them. We look through the grass for more of his favorite bugs, saw some worms just below the dirt by a tree. Looking up we see a big spider web being made between two branches. The crows were making their calls in the distance. We are finally able to skip our stones in the stream. He gets some great skips going, and we collect some new rocks for our little garden back home.
Walking past the stream we climb up the embankment and up along the ridge where we see a Fox off in the distance. He or she walks the opposite direction we are going so it is a relief we can continue to the clearing. Where there are more bugs, rocks, and Bunnies. We pass the Deer family as they run up the hill to were, they mostly frolic or maybe they live up there. We stop for a snack of Apples, Almonds, and some cheese sticks. When we were finished Drew put a couple of slices in his pocket to feed the Bunnies, I am sure.
“Mommy we’re getting to the clearing now we can see the Bunnies and the last time Daddy, and I were here I got some neat rocks too.” Drew told ne enthusiastically, I did love his passion for nature, though again my husband is much better at the nature stuff. I am a pastry Chef ask me about desserts and I am your woman, about why moss grows on trees and hello Google. Since Dad is unavailable, I step in and let him explore and see the world outside of the house and off the screen.
It is just another half mile and it is on to the clearing. He starts to pull me hand a little harder I know he is excited. We pass under the tree I glance up and see the Fox again. Then we stop and see “Daddy home……
Name: Rachel Schneider
Course: ENG 361
Date: 4/14/2020
Instructor: Debbie Graves
One Week In Las Vegas
The countdown started Friday at 2pm I got the week off from this thing I call a job (just over broke). The car was packed, it was time to hit the road. The traffic was average and climbing the Cajon Pass was not that bad. I stopped in Baker to have my favorite meal at Bob’s Big Boy, the chili spaghetti, no onions. After making my way back on the highway the traffic picked up going out of Baker, through to Primm and Stateline. I had to stop for gas at Whiskey Pete’s, so I also went in and got some snack goodies. My favorite trail mix and some cheese potato chips because vending machines are too expensive. The road was beckoning so off I went, traveling through Jean is always nice, not much to see. A prison, a few remaining casinos, some outbuildings, and a truck stop. There slogan was always fun 40 smiles closer than Vegas. You can get bored so be sure to pack some music you can have your own car concert. “I’ll face it with a grin I’m never giving in, on with the show” (Show Must Go on by Queen)
Finally, the Vegas skyline is in sight, the lights are not on yet, but they will be needing to navigate around the strip. I do say a few words the terrible drivers. This vacation was so needed my job is crazy, my kids are older now and do not need mom around anymore. Off they went to grandma’s house and I booked the week at the Delano, it is attached to the Mandalay bay so perfect access to all the fun of the strip, and just enough luxury to not look cheap. Getting the valet to take the car I check into my genuinely nice room I have a great view of the Luxor light (that comes off the top of the hotel) and the Excalibur. Now off to indulge in that genuinely nice bathtub and get some overdue reading done. My bathroom with a view has the Luxor light and that is the brightest light on the Vegas strip it comes right out of the top of the Pyramid shaped hotel. A brightness of 42.3 billion candela, you could read a paper from 10 miles straight up if you wanted to.
Once I was well soaked and finished with my chapters it was time to find something to eat besides my snack foods. After cruising the room service options, I settled on some Mexican food of chorizo and eggs with nice corn tortillas. That hit the spot so with the extra energy it was time to get out for a stroll of the property. The indoor pool is nice but small and I want to soak up the sunshine and get some exercise so I shall hit the outdoor pool tomorrow. Back in the lobby I grab those ads for things to do in the city so I can plan out the rest of my trip. There are thousands of things to do in Vegas. Do not be disappointed if you do not get everything done, that is what the next trip is for. I have a beautiful week and I want to have a good time and not have to wait for anybody, I can do what I want. I got those and cruised up through the lobby and toward the casino on my way there I saw a sign for a food and wine festival. With that guy Zac from the travel channel. Thinking hmm I did not know he was interested in food or wine. I went down and found my favorite penny slot game Lucky cat. After 15 minutes I came out putting 20 in and winning 500, so I called it a night and went to the bar to catch a hockey game and grab a fun fruity drink (I like tequila sunrise, (Tequila, grenadine, and cranberry juice). As I am rooting for the Golden Knights (local Vegas hockey team) I looked over to my left and there was Zac from the travel channel, and he likes hockey too this is awesome, and I am trying not to be a fan girl.
The game was in intermission and the Knights were winning so it was time for a new fruity drink so this time I turned around to get back to the bar and bumped right into Zac, boy was my face red. After some apologies and an offer to buy my next fruity drink (a Strawberry Daiquiri) it was a yes and I spilled that I was a fan. He told me he does have an interest in food and wine not just chasing ghosts with his crew. We had some great conversation and when the game came back on, we both sat in the booth cheering the golden knights to their victory. Now I am buzzed and standing up was going to be fun, but Zac was a true gentleman and helped me to my feet. He offered to buy me dinner. The Taco Hut was a good place the tortillas were fresh, and the company was so cool. The conversation turned to food, wine, travel, and some stuff about me. The midnight hour rolled around, and Zac had an early morning, so we said goodnight, but he was staying one floor above me, so we agreed to go to the diner in the lobby for breakfast or brunch. At 10am I was enjoying my company and this great stick to your ribs breakfast (scrambled eggs, sausage, hash browns and some great watermelon) The food offerings in Vegas are so varied you can get everything from a hot dog and beer for 1.99 at the Orleans, to a 5-star meal at Caesar’s Palace the buffets are great too. Although sometimes you want a nice sit-down dinner.
The conversation was effortless the attraction was deep. We made plans to see each other again after the food contest he was judging was over. Saying goodbye was a bit hard but the hand holding was sweet and made me feel like a schoolgirl again. After saying goodbye and I did watch him walk into the convention hall I went back to my room to plan out the rest of my day. I chose a tour of the Mob Museum, they say that Vegas was built with Mob money, but it was a Mormon founded town that later Hollywood discovered. Then many people in Hollywood who were well connected (such as East Coast mobsters) financed Bugsy Segal to build the Flamingo Hotel. As I was putting my shoes on, I got a knock on the room door and as I opened it, I got some flowers (pink roses) and an all-access pass to the food and wine festival courtesy of Zac. Let us just say the Mob Museum can wait for later I got to go to a food and wine festival and spend the rest of the week with Zac. “hi Zac thanks for the flowers it was sweet of you to remember.” He said, “It’s always right to remember a ladies flower preference because that’s the right thing to do.” Smiling the rest of the day I meet other travel channel celebrities and got to taste some great foods and many different wines. The food and wine offerings at the hotels and restaurants are varied, the Las Vegas area have become very international, so the varieties are endless.
The week went by in a blur of food, wine, conversation, and some sweet dates. I never thought I would get over the break-up that happened the week before. Getting a private Vegas tour was something completely special. I did get to see the Mob Museum, Mandalay Bay Fine Art Museum, seven magic mountains, Pinball Hall of fame and a private dinner at the food and wine festival. My days in Vegas were down to one. We had reservations at Rivera right here at the Delano the view is amazing, the food is impressive with Italian and French offers. “I have had a wonderful time this week Zac thank you for mending my broken heart.” He looked at me for a minute and said, “it’s been a pleasure to get to know you and I would not mind visiting your hometown, you always have a reason to come back to Las Vegas. The next food and wine festival is around Christmas, this one will include chocolate.” Hitting the 15 early the next morning I have visions of Christmas, a pass to the food and wine festival, also a brand-new relationship to take back home with me.
The End
When writing a short story, you want to keep it from rambling and have enough details to keep it fresh. When your reader gets into the story you want them to feel like they are there with you, going to the food and wine festival, on that hike through the seven-mountains or touring the mob museum. The details are the thing to see and make sure to watch out for punctuation and common language. An average short story is within 6,00 words or 24 pages. If you wanted too you could go short-short story and that is between 500 and 2,00 words. That comes out to be 6 pages (Minot, Steven Ch. 7 pg. 41), talk about short stories. The story is all your length and style matter as much as how you want it to come into focus.
Minot, Steven and Theil Daniel Three genres the writing of literary pose, poems and plays Ninth edition Pearson Publications 2012
Bouncing Dog Toy Emporium
August 18,2019📷📷
24755 Holly Grove Way
Brookings OR, 97415
Dear Dogs, Rule the World
I am Rachel Schneider from the Bouncing Dog Toy Emporium we make extra bouncy dog toys for our furry friends. We investigated different marketing companies and choose you to do our direct to customer marketing. The way the website is set up the customers can get the product’s directly from you is easier than a multi-level marketing plan. The distribution of Bouncy Dog Toy will be a one level channel, we will provide the toys you market, and we sell them. I would like to get some videos of our company dogs Mac and Stella playing with the toys so you can post on the website. A link for the company can also be included so the consumers know where the toys came from, what they are made of and any other facts about Bouncing Dog Toy Emporium.
Sincerely, Rachel V Schneider
Mac and Stella company dogs and testers 📷
📷 📷📷 📷A sample of our products, our bounciest toys.
Scott’s Story Part 1
I am Scott Thorn, and I am going back to WDU for the first time in 15 years, I went here for a year but after I came out as gay there really were no gay dudes. I am all men but yeah lesbians were all around some BI guys but no real gay dudes. I went back to the mainland and attended Preston University I majored in administration and minored in Literature. I did at one point in my life have a girlfriend and wanted to marry her, but I could not quash the gay lifestyle. That part of my life is over and now the old school offered me a counseling job, have not done this in a while. I get to help students toward there after college career.
I sit here on this boat and keeping an eye on my 75 Triumph I have some nerves, but it is mostly about seeing this place again, so as the boat pulls up, I get my bike going and make a stop at my new on campus apartment. Its west facing because I like sunsets more than sunrise, so I did not know it needed so much work. I have some handy skills but a little at a time. The kitchen is decent and so is the bathroom. The floors will need some polish and the deck needs to be stained, this is a duplex, so I hope the neighbors are quiet. It is furnished and done nicely so I cannot complain too much, but back on the bike to see the Dean.
I get my bike set with the kill switch and walk up the way to the Admin building, I am pretty much the only one dressed. I am wearing my good black jeans and my dress shirt, in my favorite color Maroon. I do remember this place was obsessed with sex so I will stick out wearing clothes, as I enter the building at least more admin people are dressed. Miss Grant the secretary shows me to my new office, its spacious much bigger that my last one at Preston where I shared a cubicle with another person. I have files from past students and current ones, so I started filing them when Dean Kane walks in, booty shorts and a tank top. “Welcome back to WDU Scott, we look forward to seeing you succeed you come very recommended.” I could hardly concentrate because this Dean was hung but I persevered and said, “Thank you sir I look forward to helping young students find there after WDU careers.”
After he left, I had to get my rise to settle then I continued filing and looking through some files. Clarissa Love that was a name that got around even all the way to Preston. I think she does the Jax in the bedroom or something like that. I started looking around and thought I need some life in this office so I asked Miss Grant about decorating and she said I could do what I wanted but no painting, so I went to town and checked out a flea market. I found some pictures of the beaches of Canada, some old homes in the area and a few movie posters from Rocky horror Picture Show (it is my favorite). The flea market said they will deliver to the school tomorrow so I told them I will be there at 9am.
Now with my day done I get to the store to buy some groceries and realize this place uses sextons and I was down to my last few, so now I will need to exchange but thankfully a bank is nearby so I can get some of my mainland money exchanged. I pull up to my new pad off load my few groceries and notice some other tenant left beer in the fridge, talk about luck. I got the beer went to the deck and watched the sunset over the sky. It was going to be new here, but I needed a fresh start after getting dumped and losing the job because my ex was in upper management, never will I do that again. I will find someone who does not work in the school system. After I ate a roast beef and cheddar sandwich for dinner, watched some cooking shows it was time for bed. As I was brushing my teeth, I heard the neighbors having sex. Oh, goody they are not quiet. hope they do not have super energy either. Tomorrow is my first full day and I have decorating to do, fantastic they stopped, that is the thing with us older people we do not fuck like bunnies anymore. As far as I know the neighbors are lesbians so who knows.
Sample 1- If I try my hardest, I could muster up enough courage to ask the prettiest girl in school to prom. I had a suit; bolo tie and I will shine my old boots up. The thing is my courage is not as strong as my best friend Nick, now there is one brave dude who just asked the girl I wanted to go to prom with and of course she said yes. I gather myself close my locker and put on my best smile for them both. Nick and I high five and I hug her, trying to be genuine but it is hard. I head to my Social studies class and sit down next to Megan she looks at me with some concern I tell her what happened, she then asks me to Prom…...
Sample 2-Wishing I did not have to be here I sit at the back of the funeral and think about my old high school principal. I grew up in a small town and everyone knew everyone, we only had one school and you went there for kindergarten through senior year. After my graduation I packed up my old car and headed out to what I thought was the real world. Living in a bigger city only helped spur my loneliness so who says you cannot come home again, well Mom for starters because I abandoned my family, I am not welcome at home ever again (so tired of her drama), so I am staying at Principal Mason’s house yes, the same principal that I am at a funeral for I held her hand as she lay there succumbing to cancer……
Sample 3-If you really want to get over a breakup getting back on the horse will help things along. I thought that too seven lousy dates ago so here I am on date number 8 and I am not seeing any birds singing or rainbows in the sky. He steps away to take a call he is a particularly important lawyer after all (I need to fix my picker) after he comes back, he says it go time the jury has come back so off he goes. I finish my drink and head back to my brownstone close by, I pass the new chocolate shop that just opened, and I get inside and see chocolate heaven. Looking around I do not see him at first but there he is my old college lab partner Sam I just saw a rainbow…….
Holy cow, apparently I need to write more or it all comes out in one go like this. Apologies in advance for my perspicacity. But hey, we’re all geeks here, and if it inspires just one person, then it won’t be in vain. Anyway, our story so far...
I started on WW last week. I’ve been framing it not as a diet, but as learning all over again How to Eat. Or as Michael Pollan told us so succinctly, “Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants.” And I had been sucking at all three for a damned long time.
So there I was at lunch today, grabbing some Popeyes chicken. I went for a five-piece blackened tenders, mustard sauce for dipping, and mashed potatoes and gravy on the side. I find this meal rather amusing because each component is 4 points, for a total of 12. That is, as long as you can avoid... The Biscuit. [Insert dramatic cello riff here.] You see, The Biscuit is 8 points all by itself.
So when I first opened the box, I chucked The Biscuit aside into the to-go bag. But there it sat, looking at me all forlorn and tragic-like. A quick check after lunch of my 48 daily points showed 25 down, and a whopping 23 to go. For reference, 23 points is a McDonald’s Double Quarter Pounder with Cheese. Or if you prefer, an In-N-Out Double-Double with one point left to spare.
I could totally down that whole biscuit and still have brought points for a good healthy dinner without dipping into my weeklies. I figured at least one bite won’t hurt anything, right? So I ripped off a chunk of that biscuit, and it... was... awful! I felt like I was eating a straight up chunk of Crisco. Suffice to say, the rest of the biscuit didn’t get eaten.
And then after work tonight, the whole process repeated itself. One of my favorite little guilty pleasures after a rough night at work is one of those good old gas station ice cream sandwiches. You know the ones. They’re about a buck, they have that soft chocolate wafer on the outside that sticks ever-so-slightly to your fingers... But I digress. I grabbed one of those and a Perrier. You can keep your La Croix, I’ve been a Perrier slut for years and will do unspeakable things for Pink Grapefruit flavor... But there I go digressing again. I get back to the car, pop the Perrier, have a mighty satisfying swig. I coax the ice cream bar from its wrapper, have a couple of bites, and... the thrill is gone. The pleasure center of my brain doesn’t drop any dopamine; whoever in my brain was on that lever just shrugged. I took a couple more tentative nibbles. Each was less satisfying than the last in a most peculiar fashion. The second half of the bar got unceremoniously dumped in the trash.
Ever since I started WW, I have been terrified by the spectre of the dreaded extinction burst. What’s the extinction burst? Glad you asked. It’s something your brain does when you try to change a habit. It’s that moment when you’re trying to eat healthier and your brain says “Screw everything, healthy eating sucks, we’re going out tonight for a triple cheeseburger with onion rings and a chocolate shake, and let’s wash it down with an 80-point slice of Cheesecake Factory Oreo Dream Extreme cheesecake.” It’s that moment where your brain recognizes it hates drastic change and binges on everything you had been missing out on for the previous two weeks.
But now, instead of wondering if I will be able to overcome the extinction burst when it happens, I’m wondering if it will happen at all. And if it does happen, I wonder if I’m going to take a seat at the local fancy casino buffet, ready for a grand feast that will put the “all” in “all-you-can-eat”, have a couple of bites, and... just put it down and walk away. Here’s to hoping.
EDIT: forgot the TL;DR: If you’ve been eating healthy for a while, Popeyes biscuits suck.
submitted by I can't figure out why the Carvers restaurant hasn't opened yet. Covid is pretty much gone in Perth and other buffets are in operation. I called the Casino today and they said their other restaurants are open but no idea about when Carvers is going to reopen.
That place was popular with the oldies and people that wanted a cheap feast I really hope they don't close permanently. Anyone know what's up?
submitted by Continuing. After the third pony keg of beer was delivered, it was decided that the next few days would be spent in the conference room discussing what we thought was the best way forward.
We wanted dry-erase boards so we could start taking detailed notes, even though I was well ahead of the curve in that regard. We instead ended up with some mobile elementary-school blackboards and a pile of grainy, sooty chalk.
Leave it to Dr. Cliff to go into a discourse on the genesis of chalk and its economic importance.
Bloody carbonate geologists.
Bloody White Cliffs.
We geologists need to punctuate their conversations with pictures, so these would suffice quite well.
At 1700 hours, the official end to the workday was called; we’d meet here again tomorrow. I’m not certain by whom, but it was readily agreed upon. We were more or less on our own until 1000 the next day. I needed to spend some time in my room with my notes and update a number of dossiers, field notebooks, and other items I was using as a running chronicle.
Several folks decided to invade one of the hotel’s restaurants for dinner. Some wanted to head to the casino, a couple wanted to get a massage, and others wanted to do what tourists are normally wont to do on the second day of being a foreigner in a foreign land.
I declined invitations to dinner and other activities, as I had a long writing session in front of me. I wanted to get this all in its proper place while the memories and notes were still fresh.
30 minutes later, in my room after a 25-minute wait for the elevator; I’m updating dossiers, creating several new ones, and updating my field notebooks. Suddenly, after an hour’s work, I notice something is amiss.
“I don’t have a drink or a cigar,” I said to the four walls. “This. Will. Not. Do.”
I was used to Happy Hour in Russia. Happy hour is slightly different; there are no ice cubes or orange-peel twists in the vodka. Also, it lasts all day.
I remedy that situation by finding and clipping a nice, oily oscuro cigar and digging the bourbon out from under my boxer-briefs in my dresser drawer. I heft the bottle and feel that it’s significantly lighter than when I left it last night. I happen to look in the trash can and spy the wrapper for a box of my festively colored Sobranie cigarettes I obtained back in Dubai.
“Hmmm”, I think, “It would appear that we have some light-fingered Cho Louies or No Louises around here. I’d best guard my supplies a little more securely.”
I move all my smokeables into one of my now emptied aluminum travel cases. They lock with the stoutest of combinations and it will be readily apparent if anyone is fucking with them.
I move some of my best booze into the pretty much worthless in-room safe. With a deft application of duct tape, I seal the safe. It may not be the most secure spot on the planet, but if anyone tries anything troublesome, they’ll leave an immediately recognizable record of what they were up to. It’s just too obvious; they’d have to be crazy to go in after anything inside there.
My money, keys, and passports are in the safe deposit box down in the lobby that the hotel supplies for visiting dignitaries. Even so, they let me keep my shit in one of them anyway.
That handled, I spend another hour writing like a madman. I suddenly realize I’m tired of all this and need a diversion as well as some food and, of course, drink.
30 minutes later, I’m down in the byzantine basement tunnels of the hotel. It’s crowded with hordes of Chinse tourists, and the casino is ground zero for the incredibly loud chatter.
I look in on the bowling alleys all three of them, and they’re full. The massage parlor is hopping, although I leave my name and they promise they will call over the PA when a suitable masseuse is available. Evidently, I ‘intimidate’ some of the more demure ones.
I wander over to the bar, now there’s a surprise, and see it’s packed to the rafters as well. I decide to wait for a seat to open up on Mahogany Ridge when there’s some gargling over the PA and a pair of Chinese nationals leave the bar in great haste.
I grab one of the two newly open seats, much to the chagrin of a couple of Oriental Unidentifiables (OU) who had their eye on them as well.
“Sorry, mate”, I said, “First come, first served. It’s the capitalist way.”
One of the pair grabs a seat and the other just stands there, looking annoyed unspent bullets in my direction. Forget that I’ve literally twice their size and could be an aberration as an angry American. They just order a couple of drinks, and content themselves in giving me dirty looks and probably say nasty things in their own indecipherable language about my national origin and familial heritage.
As if I gave the tiniest of rodental shits.
I fire up a cigar, as literally everyone else in the joint was smoking something more or less tobacco. However, there was a definite barnyard aroma, a regular Dairy Air, in the room. I think some of what was being smoked there was more bovine or equine in origin than botanical in nature.
With numerous hilarious attempts at Korean, pointing at a garishly photographed drinks menu, I was finally served a cold draft house steam porter and 100 milliliters of probably ersatz ‘Russian’ vodka, vintage late last Thursday. This bartender that could at least form some of the phonemes found in American English. A few. A definite few.
Since it all cost the equivalent of US$0.50, I really didn’t care.
Apparently vodka helps flowers last longer when they're dying. But you can put vodka in anything and it'll make it better.
Being a trained observer, I rather enjoy just sitting in any old bar, smoking my cigar, drinking my Yorshch, and watching people. I try and not be intrusive and I never eavesdrop, but I like to try and think of what strange set of circumstances brought us all here together in this place at this time. It gives me writing ideas, some of which I jot down in a notebook I always carry. It also gives me a good shot of nostalgia when I look back at something I wrote some 40 or so years ago.
Yeah, old habits do die hard.
I take a drag off my cigar and set it in the ashtray in front of me on the bar as I go to correct another egregious misspelling in my notebook. I have to immediately proofread what I wrote, or I’d never recall later what the fuck I was trying to convey; especially if it’s in a noisy, smoky, or murky milieu.
Quicker than a bunny fucks, Unidentifiable Oriental #1 (UO #1) deftly reaches over, snags my cigar, and helps himself to a few mouthy puffs.
I look at him, the empty ashtray directly in front of me, him again, and then UO #2.
Since I speak no real Oriental, much less Korean, language, and my Mandarin at this point is worse than laughable; I just point to the cigar, turn out my hands and shrug my shoulders in the international “What the actual fuck, dude?” gesture.
He just smiles a gappy, toothy, and snaggle-toothed at that, grin at me and makes a point of ensuring that I see him enjoying a few more drags on my own damned cigar.
Not able to contain myself any further, I venture a “What the fuck, chuckles? That’s not your fucking cigar.”
Like gasoline being tossed on a fire-ring full of embers, they both go unconditionally incoherently insane.
Yammering, chattering, jumping up and down, and getting right into my face. They wanted me to unquestionably understand that my few words of English insulted them far more than their filching of my $20 cigar.
OK, I’m pretty well trained in Hapkido; an oddly, given the present situation, hybrid Korean martial art. I’m at least 6 or 7 inches taller and who knows how many stone/kilos/pounds/Solar masses heavier than these two clowns. I could easily go all Gojira on their hapless asses and mop significant expanses of the floorboards with them.
Instead, I look around for the bartender. I figured since I was keeping him well supplied with Korean won via tips, and he spoke some English as well as perhaps whatever the fuck these characters were chattering; maybe he could get to the bottom of what was happening.
The bartender walks over and I ask him to ask the two unidentifiable twins why they stole my cigar.
He nods in agreement and goes on in whatever the fuck dialect was being used today by the pair.
“They say they wanted it. So they took it.” They ask, “What are you going to do about it?” the bartender relates.
I deftly reach inside my field vest, as everyone concerned ducks and covers.
I extract two fresh cigars; not a .454 Casull Magnum.
I give one cigar to the bartender and one to OU#2.
“With my compliments.” I pleasantly say.
I was well apprised of the fact that in certain places like this, the local authorities often approach foreigners with, for the lack of a better term, ‘
Agents Provocateur’.
Like the Westboro Baptist “Church”, they try to get a rise out of you so you’ll lose your cool and either create a scene or take a poke at the miscreant. Then they have all the pretext they require to drag you to the local hoosegow, shake you down for every penny on your person, as well as any phones, notebooks, wallets, passports, cigars, cigarettes, etc.
Basically, they goad you into a fight, then drop the thousand-pound shit-hammer when you retaliate.
It’s all so parochial. So obviously clear as vodka; this elementary charade only raised a single eyebrow.
I’m not going to even raise my voice over a couple of cheap cigars that neither of them noticed I slipped them instead of the premium ones I was smoking.
Thus defeated, I asked the bartender to ask them if they liked the cigar.
“What do you think?” I asked in cordial English, “Too tightly rolled? Not caged enough? Too green?”
UO #2 slipped and said “It smells very good…” where he realizes he’s blown his cover.
“Yeah, I like it too.”, I replied, “So much so, I buy my own. What are your badge numbers, boys? I will be reporting this incident to Inspector P'aeng Yeong-Hwan, the head of security for the IUPGS conference to which I was invited as special scientific consultant.”
Of course, they immediately dummy up and feign illiteracy.
I say loudly and very clearly, “You bastards aren’t gonna get away with this. I mean, what is going on in this country when scumsuckers like you can get away with trying to sandbag a Doctor of Geological Sciences?”
I ask the bartender to translate, but alas, it was too late. They vamoosed when I turned to talk with the bartender.
They left so fast, they didn’t notice me snapping their pictures with my ancient but trusty Nokia 3310, revised edition, during our little chat. Even with a mere 2-megapixel picture, I have enough to show the North Korean leaders of the project to get an identification and make known my displeasure of being treated like some commoner or buffoon.
They left both my cigar and the one I gave them. The bartender tucked the cigar I gave him into his pocket and stared lustily at the two remaining on the bar.
“Take’em”, I said. I sure as fuck don’t want them. “Just a clean ashtray and a refill, if you would be so kind,” I say, as pleasantly as possible, considering the situation.
Both the unsmoked and my smoldering, as well as well-traveled, cigar disappear as quickly as minks rut. A clean, new ashtray, double beer and ‘vodka’ suddenly appear.
“No charge, Dr. Rock”, the bartender grins, as he shoves my erstwhile high-mileage cigar between his teeth.
“OK, fair enough.”, I say, “Spaseebah.”, and deposit a raft of won on the bar. The pile won’t be touched until after I leave in a few hours’ time.
“Stranger in a strange land.” I muse over a couple of further beers.
The call from the massage parlor never came, or it did and I couldn’t hear it over the clamor of the casino. I went up to the hotel’s Korean restaurant; had some salty soup, a sad, sad salad, and some form of funky fish, I think, for dinner. I retired that night in a slightly foul mood.
I called Es then the next morning and caught her before she retired. With a 14 hour difference between us, I was getting up at 0700 and she was getting ready to hit the hay at 2100.
I told her of the events of the day previous, and she was glad she wasn’t tagging along. She would have never accused the Korean geologists of being behind the times and would have probably bent the guy’s nose that swiped my cigar.
Agreed, that she’d probably be unimpressed with this place. I promised her that we’d go on a holiday when I returned from all this. It would be up to her to find out ‘where,’ and I’d supply the ‘when’ when I could.
Everything else was going along smoothly, more or less, on the home front, and I didn’t want to give the local listening-in
federales too much to say grace over, so we said our parting admirations and rang off.
Shower, shower sunriser of real vodka and citrus, a quick brush and comb, and spiff of cargo shorts and new ghastly Hawaiian shirt; 30 minutes later, back down in the restaurant for the inevitable breakfast buffet.
After what some would consider breakfast and others would consider a vague attempt at nourishment, we reconvened in the conference room precisely at 1012.
Nothing like precision with this group.
We spend the next two days going over, in various groups, what we think would be required to set forth proper the quest for oil and gas in North Korea on track. Everyone got in on the act, and we advocated for that. We needed everyone’s input to make this happen. Or to even map a way forward to present to country officials. Those from the West on what was needed and those from the East to tell us what was available, and the combined wetware to make what needed to be done happen with what existed.
It took no small amount of doing, but we secured a set of maps that covered the entire country. We were watched very closely by the shiny suit squad that we did not copy, photograph or otherwise take any extraneous information from these sheets of infamy. All other maps in the country were intentionally skewed, with errors deliberately added in to confuse “interlopers, spies, or other
personas non grata”.
I made a massive stink and told them that if we didn’t receive the unfuckered maps, aerial photographs and satellite imagery pronto, we’re packing up and leaving that afternoon.
“We don’t have time for monks resisting the carnival. We didn’t come here to try and guess if the maps are correct or if our remedies will actually work on maps that say one thing and reality says something else entirely.”
They hemmed and hawed, but as I made the announcement to all before lunch that if the real maps didn’t appear by the time we returned from tiffin, we’re gone.
And we take tiffin purty durn early round these parts, buckaroo.
No one was surprised as I when we returned and there were folio after folio of government-uncensored maps, photos, and imagery for our program. I guess they finally reasoned it would be a relatively good idea to begin to take us seriously.
We spent one whole day just going over our field geological apparatus. They had a good idea of how to use a direction-finder compass and Jacob’s staff to measure sections. However, they were totally flummoxed by our Brunton Compasses, GPS systems, curiously referred to as ‘position finders’, notebook mapping applications, and electronic data storage and retrieval systems.
Gad. It was like being back in the 1970s before PCs were a glimmer in IBM's corporate orbs.
We spent the next week working to bring our less fortunate colleagues up to, well, not date, but at least up to the brink of the 21st century. We explained that plate tectonics, continental drift, and the precession of the continents was accepted geoscientific principles, not some arcane Capitalist or Socialist plot to undermine the quality of science in the east.
Yep. It was that mindset we had to first conquer. I think we’ve made great headway in that direction today.
The next Chautauqua session had us split up into two separate groups. We decided in a fit of Cesarean inquiry to ‘divide and conquer’. There are two distinct
milieus which are able to contain economic deposits of hydrocarbons: onshore and offshore.
Instead of attacking both head-on, we’d focus initially on the offshore domain. Once we had a good handle on what was going on under the East Korean Sea, the Huangai (Yellow) Sea and surreptitiously, the South Sea; we’d collaborate our findings and work to tie them in and extend them onshore.
The singular Phyongnam Basin is the one large depositional, sedimentological, and structural basin in North Korea. It is filled by the Joeson and Pyeongan Supergroups of sediments, which are Cambro-Ordovician and Permocarboniferous, respectively. These are good hunting grounds for oil and gas. Could be
elephant–hunting country.
But before we could undertake that, we had to get ‘back to basics’. That is, we had to understand and delineate the ‘frame’ of the Korean Peninsula. In other words, we needed to figure out how and when the peninsula came into existence.
South Korea’s geology is much more complex, fortunately than that found in the North. There were nasty side comments that were due to the relative development not of the geology, but of the geologists who studied each country’s geology.
It was, perhaps, a mean way of characterizing the situation. But, unfortunately, it was also probably fairly accurate.
The Korean Peninsula is characterized by huge
massifs, which are sections of a crust that are demarcated by faults or flexures. In the movement of the crust, a massif tends to retain its internal structure while being displaced as a whole. The term also refers to a group of mountains formed by such a structure. It’s basically one huge, semi-resilient rock.
The basement rocks of the Korean Peninsula consist of high-grade gneiss and schist, Paleoproterozoic Precambrian massifs, which formed in the early stage of Earth’s history. These rocks are unconformably overlain by metasedimentary rocks; schist, quartzite, marble, calcsilicate, and amphibolite, of the Middle to Late Proterozoic. The Korean Peninsula is floored by a collation of about five of these huge Precambrian massifs that acted like ‘microplates’ during the aggregation of the peninsula. These massifs consist of thick dolostone, metavolcanics, and schist, which were intruded by Paleoproterozoic granites.
These Paleoproterozoic metasedimentary and granitic rocks underwent repeated intracrustal differentiation, followed by the events of cratonization, i.e., regional metamorphism and igneous activity, at 1.9-1.8 Ga. Sediments deposited in the peripheral basins during the Mesoproterozoic and Neoproterozoic lead to stabilization as the basement of the peninsula.
These early depositional basins formed the locus of deposition that continued on from the Proterozoic through the Phanerozoic. There are at least three, perhaps four, depositional basins in the south which are delimited by structural zones, such as the South Korean Tectonic Line (SKTL), a huge zone of continental transform faults and forms the basis of boundary demarcation between the Okcheon and Taebaeksan basins.
The boundary between the Seochangri Formation of the Okcheon Basin and the Joseon Supergroup of the Taebaeksan Basin in the Bonghwajae area is a thrust (or reverse‐slip shear zone). This thrust is presumably a relay structure (i.e. a restraining bend) between two segments of a continental transform fault (the South Korean Tectonic Line or SKTL), along which the Okcheon Basin of the South China Craton was juxtaposed against the Taebaeksan Basin of the North China Craton during the Permian–Triassic suturing of the two cratons.
In the late Proterozoic, sedimentation was initiated in basins of the Korean Peninsula, accompanied by deposition of siliciclastic and volcaniclastic sediments as well as carbonates. The massifs were submerged in the Early Paleozoic during a greenhouse period, forming a shallow marine platform and associated environments.
The Cambrian-Ordovician succession unconformably overlies Precambrian granite gneiss. It consists of mixed carbonate-siliciclastic rocks of sandstone, shale, and shallow-marine carbonates. Sedimentation was initiated in the Early Cambrian with a global rise in sea level on the stable craton of the Sino-Korean Block.
There was a major break in sedimentation during the Silurian and Devonian periods in the entire platform. During the Carboniferous to early Triassic, sedimentation was resumed in coastal plain and swamp environments with progradation of deltas.
Major tectonic events were initiated in the Triassic when the South China Block collided with the Sino-Korean Block. The eastern part of the Sino-Korean Block rotated clockwise and moved southward relative to the South China Block along the SKTL.
In the Middle-Late Jurassic, orthogonal subduction of the paleo-Pacific plate under the Asian continent caused compression and thrust deformation. A number of piggyback basins formed along the thrust faults in the east of the SKTL. At the same time, the entire peninsula was prevailed by granite batholiths, especially along the northeast-southwest-trending tectonic belt.
In the Cretaceous Period, the paleo-Pacific Plate subducted northward under the Asian continent, forming numerous extensional (left-lateral strike-slip) basins in the southern part of the peninsula and the Yellow Sea. A large back-arc basin was initiated in the southeastern part.
In the Paleogene, both the volcanic arc and the back-arc basin ceased to develop, as volcanic activities shifted eastward, accompanied by a rollback of the subduction of the Pacific plate. In the Miocene, pull-apart (right-lateral) basins formed in the eastern continental margin.
The Korea Plateau experienced continental rifting accompanied by extensive volcanism during the extensional opening of the southern offshore basin. It subsided more than 1000 m below sea level.
So, as South Korea was mix- mastered by a half-a-billion years’ worth of structural tectonism, which created several depositional basins quite capable of generating and storing economic quantities of oil and gas, the scene to the north was much more quiescent.
The North was composed, from south to north, of the relict Imjingang Belt, which was an old back-arc basin between the Gyeonggi Massif to the south and the Nagrim Massif to the north. It is a paleo-subduction zone, full of volcanics, volcaniclastics and other non-hydrocarbon bearing rocks. It was mashed and metamorphosed, and basically forms a convenient boundary between the complex geology of the South and the more relaxed geology of the North.
Heading north, we come across the Pyeongnam Basin, the only North Korean basin thus far defined that could contain hydrocarbons. Further north is the huge Nangrim Massif. It’s a huge block of igneous and metamorphic rocks that weather very nicely and form some spectacular scenery, but from an oil and gas economic outlook are worthless.
Offshore North Korea, there are two possible petroliferous basins. The offshore West Korea Bay Basin and East Sea Basin, along with five onshore basins could be offering exploration potential. At least ten exploration wells have been drilled in the West Sea, with some showing “good oil shows” along with the identification of a number of potential reservoirs.
The West Sea potentially has oil and has reportedly flowed oil at reasonable rates from at least two exploration wells when they were drilled and tested in the 1980s. Meanwhile, the East Sea has seen Russian exploration efforts previously including the drilling of two wells, both of which reportedly encountered encouraging shows of oil and gas.
Onshore, there has been little exploration to date, apart from efforts by the Korean Oil Exploration Corporation and also recently by Mongolia’s HBOil JSC (HBO). Among five main onshore sedimentary sub-basins, the largest is south of the capital; while unconfirmed reports point to a 1-trillion-cubic-foot (tcf) discovery in 2002.
Historically DPRK was thought to consist of five under-explored geological basins, the
• Pyongyang,
• Zaeryong,
• Anju-Onchon,
• Gilju-Myongchon and
• Sinuiju, Basins.
These basins are all located more or less along the coast, rather than inland. This also points to a certain degree of geological aptitude; as it’s much easier to explore along the more populated coast than it is to venture inland. There may be more hiding in the interior of the country, it’s just that no one’s looked as of yet. That’s difficult. Exploring along the coast is much easier.
With 3 basins supposedly proven to have working petroleum systems; 22 wells have been drilled and the majority are said to have encountered hydrocarbons with some wells testing production at 75 barrels of oil per day of light sweet crude oil. This has yet to be documented or confirmed by the Korea Oil Exploration Corp (KOEC), North Korea’s state-run oil company.
Yeah, our work was definitely cut out for us.
It was decided that a series of excursions offshore in one of the few remaining seaworthy, which was a real judgment call, KOEC seismic boats would be appropriate. The one we received use of was an old, decommissioned Chamsuri-class patrol boat, one Chamsuri-215(참수리-215), PKMR-215 in particular.
It had been basically stripped to the gunwales and completely retrofitted as a seismic acquisition and recording vessel. It had been renamed: “조선 민주주의 인민 공화국 영광” or “Glory of Democratic People's Republic of Korea Science”.
In reality, it was an aging rust-bucket piece of shit that might have possibly seen better days but wasn’t letting on. All the military nonsense, except the powder magazine, had been removed and a new superstructure consisting of slap-dash hunks of poorly-welded low-carbon, cold-rolled steel were erected to form a pilothouse in the area where the bridge once existed. They also built, extra haphazardly, a shooter’s room, galley, cold and wet storage areas, recording room, and storage of tapes and the extra bits and pieces needed for a none-too-extended stay on the sea. It was, being charitable, almost utilitarian.
They could not make their own water, so trip times were limited to about three days in length. Besides, they didn’t really have a hot galley, so it was cold, canned Chinese chow for the next 72 hours. They had a couple of fairly sturdy yardarms with heavy winches to handle the towed seismic arrays of geophones, which were of ancient heritage and showed it. These were probably appropriated back in the 80s or perhaps earlier when they first thought about opening their waters for seismic exploration.
They ‘borrowed’ most of the sensing and recording equipment back then from oilfield service companies and simply forgot to return it once finished. Since they burned that bridge so glowingly, they couldn’t get parts nor service when things failed. Being delicate seismic sensing and recording equipment, fail they did.
So, we had to use what was leftover, or what DPRK industries could cobble together, or what could be salvaged from salt-water drenched recording equipment that hadn’t been too heavily cared for over the span of the last 50 years.
We weren’t terribly optimistic.
So, we load the good ship ‘Rorrypop’, as Viv christened the thing, and head out to the wilds of the Yellow Sea. It was an abbreviated foreign crew, as there was really nothing other than upchuck and curse me soundly for insisting the non-geophysical scientists came along.
Aboard were the two geophysicists, naturally; Volna and Activ. I was there stick-handling the logistics and hoping to help out with the geophysical signal source explosives.
Morse and Cliff, the two other geologists accompanied us on the trip, and Dax decided to go with me as he figured I’d have access to the best booze no matter where we went.
The remainder of the team, the geochemists, Erlan and Ivan, the geomechanic, Iskren, the PT, Joon, and the two REs, Viv and Grako, remained behind onshore at the hotel. They set forth cataloging what data was available; from what sources, it’s vintage, veracity, and usefulness.
Augean tasks, both. Not as fecaliferous as Hercules’ jobs, but still, they held their own rations of shit for each sub-team.
Heading seaward, the Yellow Sea extends by about 960 km (600 mi) from north to south and about 700 km (430 mi) from east to west; it has an area of approximately 380,000 km
2 (150,000 mi
2) and a volume of about 17,000 km
3 (4,100 mi
3).[4] Its depth is only 44 m (144 ft) on average, with a maximum of 152 m (499 ft). The sea is a flooded section of the continental shelf that formed during the Late Pleistocene (some 10,000 years ago) as sea levels rose 120 m (390 ft) to their current levels. The depth gradually increases from north to south. The sea bottom and shores are dominated by sand and silt brought by the rivers through the Bohai Sea and the Yalu River. These deposits, together with sand storms are responsible for the yellowish color of the water referenced in the sea's name.
Being shallow, the Yellow Sea is more perturbed by the frequent seasonal storms of the region. The area has cold, dry winters with strong northerly monsoons blowing from late November to April. I was told that the summers are wet and warm with frequent typhoons between June and October; but now all we had to contend with were swelling seas, spraying saltwater, waggling waves, and a shivering, shimmying ship.
All the navigation, communications and other shiply duties were being handled by both members of the DPRK Coast Guard Auxiliary, mostly older guys who were of great and high humorous jest; and an actual pleasure to be around. They were like their scientific cadre on this cruise, basically a political ‘give a shit’ attitude, and a desire to get the job done, smoke the American’s cigars and drink as much as we could get away with.
The scientific portion of the cruise was being undertaken by students of the various universities and members of the North Korean national oil company. The demeanors of these characters ranged from extremely earnest and stringently North Korean politically correct in the students and academicians, to a more relaxed ‘yeah, let’s just get the fucking job done so we can have a lot of drinks’ sort of view of the older members of the DPRK scientific team.
It was a fun admixture of cultures, ages, professions, and behaviors.
Oh, forgive me for forgetting to mention our ‘guides’, or handlers. They were also chosen, nay, ordered to come along. Landlubbers all, they were less than thrilled with the assignment and inevitable seasickness; which seemed endemic to those of Oriental extraction on the cruise. However, our guides did enjoy drinking. As we learned that alcohol is a central part of Korean culture, and they encouraged us to socialize with them when the time was appropriate.
Or, not appropriate, as I was being denounced by one of the geophysical students after only a few hours into our very first day. Hell, we weren’t even in the Yellow Sea proper. We started here at Pyongyang, down the Taedong River, over the Giva Dam, through Pushover, across Shmoeland, to the stronghold of Shmoe; into the very belly of the frothing Yellow Sea.
Most everyone, other than the foreign elements on board, were either making the trip in the bowels of the ship; nursing and cursing seasickness; or by rail, doing exactly the same thing.
“Chum it over the side, ya’ blinkered mucker!”, I admonished one bottle-greenish national. “This ain’t the Captain‘s mess, Chuckles.
You have to clean up your own spew!”
I was reveling in getting back out on the water and regaining my sea legs. I
never get seasick.
Never.
Ever.
Be it a seismic vessel in the heaving Arctic Ocean, a pirogue in the swamps of Louisiana, my cousin’s fishin’ johnboat back in northern Baja Canada, a US nuclear submarine under the permanent pack ice of the North Pole, or VLCC in the Straits of Somaliland; I just don’t get seasick.
Airsick? Nah. Carsick? Nope. Ready to puke in a Hind-20 over the Caspian Sea during a strong local thunderstorm? Close, but no cigar.
So, I’m doing a Titanic scene recreation. Up in the very bow of the craft, standing in stark defiance of the gusting winds and blowing salt spray, smoking a huge cigar, and totting out of one of my emergency flasks while trying to hang on to my Stetson. I am also endeavoring to remain upright, field vest and really, really ghastly Hawaiian shirt billowing in the breeze.
I’m not certain if it was the cigar smoke, the wind-whipped beard, and hair, the give a fuck attitude, or the flapping of the Hawaiian shirt to which the little local geophysicist objected. But he was
pissed. Olive-green with seasickness, rubber-kneed but still standing a good social-distance away, reading me the riot act in high-pitched Korean.
As I usually do in such delicate situations, I just smile and wave. Show them I’m mostly harmless and they either cool down or get pissed off even more and stomp off in disgust.
Either one was a winning situation for me in my book.
So, I return to doing my ship’s figurehead imitation and revel in the wind, spray, and feeling of really being booming. Sure, some might complain of the cold, but not me, the sting of the salt-spray or the windburn; but I eschew what most people enjoy as ‘normal weather’. I live for pushing the boundaries. I love rough weather and situations that thrust the edge of the envelope further past normalcy.
Besides, we were still in sight of land. Hell, if everything went south at this very minute, one could practically walk back to shore. I can hardly wait to see what these wigglers will do if a night storm comes up when were 100 or more kilometers from land.
The boat’s thrumming heavily from both the thrust of the Soviet-era diesel engines and the craft’s bludgeoning its way through the waves. Most hull designs are so the ship will ‘cut’ through the surface waters. This craft’s flattened trihedral hull design didn’t so much ‘cut’, as ‘slam’ it’s way through. The boat would then crash up one side and smash down the other of each large wave we encountered. The boat would shudder whole, adding a new note of resonance along with the monotonous one-note song of the aged Russian diesels.
The spray would fly, the boat would convulse, time would seem to freeze until we bashed into the next wave. The captain of the vessel took his orders very seriously. “Get to coordinates
XXX and
YYY by the most expedient means possible.” If that meant charging, full-throttle into the teeth of the oncoming monsoon-force wind while we were traversing the worst kelp jungle I’ve seen this side of the Sargasso Sea; well, piss on it, full steam ahead.
“Fuck it”, I thought, “Not my pony, not my show. Let’s see how this plays out.” While I light a new cigar and search for Emergency Flask #2.
After I’d been upbraided by the geophysical student for transgressions still unknown, Cliff and Dax wander out to ask me what the hell I was up to.
“Have you gone completely barmy?”, Cliff asked. “It’s a full gale out here and you’re standing in the teeth of it like it was a warm, sunny Sunday in Piccadilly.”
“Nope, not at all”, I replied, “Just reveling in the delights of an angry atmosphere.”
“He’s nuts, I told you”, Dax smirked, “He’d go anywhere and do anything to have a cigar.”
“Not just a cigar, me old mucker”, I smiled and waved my second emergency flack under his nose.
“Figures”, they both respond in unison.
Dax departs and returns mere seconds later with paper Dixie-style cups he liberated from the ship’s one head. We are going to do our very best to extend the lifetime of the onboard water supply for our scientific and military friends. I pour them each a cup full.
“Whoa, Doc”, that’s gotta be 100 milliliters!” Cliff objects.
“As the Siberian saying goes: One hundred versts, roughly a hundred miles, is no distance. A hundred rubles isn't worthwhile money. And a hundred grams of vodka just makes you thirsty. Prosit!” I say in reply.
We retire to the overhang on the fantail of the boat. It’s a sunshade and keeps the worst of the weather out for the lightweights on the cruise. I decided we’d withdraw there to keep these Dominionites out of the worst of the wind and sea spray.
“Rock”, Cliff notes, “You are a complete throwback. You do not belong here in the 21st century. You need to find a way back to the Calabrian and ride herd on the continental Neanderthals. Give them the gift of distilling and tobacco agriculture, and you’d reframe the world.”
Dax agrees, but notes if I do find a way back, he and Cliff would be selected against.
“Good point”, Cliff agrees. “Rock, stay here. We need your expertise now more than ever. Plus your ready supply of strong drink and cigars.”
“Glad to know that I’m truly appreciated around these parts.” I chuckled slightly acridly.
“Ah, Rock. Buck up. You know we’re only takin’ a piss.” Cliff says.
“Aim it starboard. Don’t want it blowin’ all over the seismic gear”, I reply, laughingly.
The trip continued, and I found a not-bolted-to-the-deck chair and moved it outside under the shade back by the boat’s fantail. I refreshed my emergency flasks and replenished my cigar supply. I’m not about to sit inside and listen to the wails and gnashing of teeth of the landlubber crowd, the patter and timor of the geophysical throng as they titter and argue about array design, nor the military hut-hutting all over the fucking boat.
A couple of times, one or more of our ‘handlers’ would venture out as I had the only supply of readily available smokeables and drinkables. Oh, we had food, lots of beer, soju, some knock-off vodka, and some of that
faux homebrew bourbon for later once the workday was declared over; but for now, I was the one and only dispensary.
We’d have some random chats while they screwed up their courage to ask me for a smoke or a tot of drink. I brought several bundles of really cheap-ass cigars for just such occasions; besides, I figured one of my Camacho triple-maduros would have them chumming for the remainder of the trip. I had also many, many cartons of Sobranie pastel-colored cigarettes, and many more cartons of knock-off Marlboros I bought at the duty-free when we hit town.
It was chucklingly funny to see these harsh, military, no-nonsense characters walking their duty beats smoking pastel green, lavender, and mauve cigarettes.
We got bogged down a couple of times when one or more of the ship’s twin screws fouled with kelp as we tried to put some distance between us and the shore. Each time, one really dejected low-ranking young Coast Guard character would go over the side with a rope around his waist and a knife in his hand to free the props. I was going to object as this was moronically dangerous; but, again, not my pony, not my show. This called for full proper tethering and SCUBA gear.
They had neither aboard.
Welcome to the wonders of a centrally planned economy.
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